Disclaimer
Our products are still in the testing phase, with limited trial runs having been performed in such extremely limited places where “permitted” by law. Due to exceptionally strict animal protection laws (that we love and adhere to with pleasure and bliss) we are incapable of seeing more than the tiniest minority of studies through to results.
At this time we can only estimate the efficacy of Dog Condoms™ at roughly 99.999% when used properly, and about -8% effective when used improperly or not at all [margin of error is +/- 9%]. These results are what statisticians would call “statistically useless”, but we know you can read between the lines and find the value in what we’ve discovered.
We warrant that all products sold will appear roughly as represented in photographic images, and that each will function an intended purpose, though whether or not it is the intended purpose is another matter entirely, and many products will serve only as novelty with little or no functional value whatsoever, whether to man or beast.
In essence our disclaimer of warranty is that if you purchase “a thing,” we will ship to you “a thing”. It may not always be exactly what you wanted, or even close, and it sure as heck may not function as you might want it to, but we will put things in packaging and send it to you after you have paid us… all sales are final.